5 Misconceptions your Parents make about Cloud Computing
Al Gore Invented the Cloud.
The collective sigh heard around the world when they read this section may signal that this joke has run its course, but you must have forgotten already, this article is about what your parent’s think. In addition, the day your dad stops telling the same bad joke over and over again is the day he is no longer a father. So let me explain an inconvenient truth (see what I did there?) about this misconception. Sure the joke, “Al Gore invented the internet,” is a little old but your parents had seven years to work on this environmental Cloud twist to the joke to shock it back to life. Now our parents will confuse their joke with reality and we have to hear them complain about Al Gore for a few more years. Just let the man be!
“Auntie Em, Auntie Em It’s a Twister!”
One day I hope you are graced with, “So if everyone uses this Cloud, how does it keep everyone’s stuff separate?” You may laugh at the absurdity of this, but sadly I was not fortunate enough of coming up with such a wonderful question. It seems that with some parents the Cloud produces thoughts of the mighty tornado, nature’s fiercest re-arranger of stuff. So it only makes sense that when the Cloud’s network processor becomes too hot and then mixes with the cooling system it produces a twister of biblical proportions from your Cloud and out pops apps, pictures, music, and movies that aren’t even yours. Because nothing can stop the mighty tornado Cloud as it throws all your information to other random Cloud users and you will lose everything!
The Cloud is an Identity Thieves’ Buffet.
Once you sit your parents down and explain, “The Cloud is a storage program on a network that allows you to move your data to multiple devices without actually having to transfer the information manually,” just buckle up and get ready. Look you can explain it perfectly and be as reasonable as you want that the feared identity thief cannot access your information on your Cloud, but major news networks are screaming much louder in your parents’ ear of all the potential problems. Really, just set it up for them and don’t tell them what you did. Now you can act like you’re a computer genius to your parents and they can go on believing how special you are, and you won’t have a three hour fight that ruins your mom’s birthday.
They don’t know if the Cloud is a Cirrus, Cumulus, or Stratus cloud.
To be fair that is a low blow for those who just aren’t into technology but let’s be honest with ourselves if you heard of iTunes then you have heard of their Cloud. Regardless, I bet you know at least one parent when asked what the best Cloud is they will give you a blank stare and then say the white fluffy ones on a nice spring day. Of course this answer is compared to the average twenty year old who won’t even answer your questions because they are just too cool for school (But I am not bitter). So here is a guide to know if your parent understands cloud computing from clouds in the sky:
Does he or she use Cloud computing and is aware of using Cloud computing?
That is it, because chances are the only clouds they know are the ones raining on them.
- The Cloud is Secretly Skynet
Let’s be honest with this one, our parents may not be that far off base. The Cloud is a network storage program that is linked throughout the world that stores your vital information and can be accessed anywhere, while Skynet, from the Terminator movies, was a interlinking network that stored vital information that eventually became self aware from all the information it stored. So let’s look at the facts. First, it is called the Cloud and that just sounds like something your right-wing parents would think was created by Obama to sound like a hip attempt to disguise the true nature of Skynet to destroy American values. In addition, Cloud computing has so much memory storage that it is really only one cat picture a way from knowing everyone’s daily schedule and a list of their fears and weaknesses to better destroy us when we become a threat to the almighty Cloud. Come to think of it, when the great and powerful Cloud becomes self aware I just hope John Connor never got into social media. Because I am pretty sure the all powerful Cloud’s Terminator wouldn’t be able to find a phonebook anymore.
By Chris Kenealy
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